Breakups, what a fun thing to go through? I can confidently say some are easier than others. But, what I have learned is that having a healthy and holy mindset through a breakup is an essential part of healing and moving on!
I once had a dear friend say to me, “healing is not linear,” and it has stuck with me ever since. I love this quote for so many reasons, but the main reason being that I believe it speaks so much truth. Throughout a breakup process, there are highs and lows, peaks and valleys. Some days are easier than others, and that is a simple truth.
I didn’t realize my mindset played a huge role in how I viewed each peak and valley. I didn’t recognize my mindset was a choice. Each morning, I had the opportunity of waking up and choosing to be angry and disappointed or at peace and grateful. It was up to me to choose a healthy and holy mindset.
Six Things to Keep in Mind During a Breakup
Here are my six pieces of advice I wish I would have heard throughout my breakup process.
- Give Yourself Time: I used to get upset when people would say, ‘just give it time.’ Looking back, I can confidently say that time has been my biggest blessing.
- Surround yourself with good people: I am so thankful I was in college throughout my breakup because I had so many friends that I could lean on. God placed some pretty amazing and supportive people within my life when I needed them most.
- Focus on the good: Even though there will be hard days, try to find the good in each day. I went through my breakup during Lent. My Lenten promise was to write down five things I was thankful for every single day.
- Lean on God: God is the only person that knows me in the past, present, and future. Why would I not lean on him? Trust me, I know it can be difficult, but God has a plan that is so much bigger and better! So, let go and let God; trust his process.
- Journal: Almost every day since my breakup, I have created time within my schedule to journal. I look at this time as a “prayer.” I write down all of my triumphs, worries, and everything in between. Go ahead, give it a try!
- Feel your emotions: There is a difference between feeling your emotions and holding onto them. It’s okay to be upset and angry. Feeling that way is part of the healing process. But, to truly move you, you cannot hold on to that anger. Let your emotions come in, feel them, and let them go.
I may not have all the answers, but I hope my outlook and past experiences can help someone walking through a difficult season. I would encourage you to look at this time as a gift from God to focus on your relationship with Him. These are the six things I wish would have popped up on my Pinterest when I searched “how to get over a relationship.’
Remember, healing is not linear, and God always has a plan, even if you may not see it.
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